Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Ladies, consider yourselves warned...
...Because everyone's favorite Flyers P-I-M-P has had his contract extended for another four years! Yay for Lupul! I would have been quite sad if he got traded again... for the third summer in a row. Four-mil-plus seems a little excessive, but I guess it's what the young guys are making these days.
Now that we have Lupul to gaze upon for a few more years, I have to wonder: could he become my permanent Flyers husband this year? Sami was my interim one, and now that he's gone back to Finland (tear), and Gator is out of the equation, will this be Lupul's time to shine? I mean, we do have oh so much in common. He's named after Chaucer, I'm an English major. He has smoldering blue eyes, I have blue eyes (albeit not of the smoldering, vortex variety, but whatev). He likes rap, I get my bangin' hip hop and r&b on while commuting to work with my aunt and cousin every day. Geez Joff, why are we not already wed in holy Flyers matrimony?! For the sake of his health, though, perhaps I should hold back. Over winter break last year, I declared to Pops that I liked Lupul. Hatcher then promptly sat on his head against Toronto, forcing him out of action for over a month. And then he got injured again immediately after that. Maybe I should leave the poor boy alone...
Friday, July 18, 2008
The Little Mer-Mike?
Since the Flyers lost their captain Gator to free agency madness, everyone's curious who his successor will be... including Mike Richards, apparently.
It’s the offseason, and Mike Richards is attempting to sleep, but he keeps tossing and turning, muttering phrases like, “Captain… The sun… Awesomely responsible boyfriend… CAPTAIN…” This last thought obviously has him freaked out, and he begins to dream of the Flyers locker room. Except that he’s standing in the middle of it, wearing his jersey with a C sewn on it! He realizes this in horror, and when he looks up again, his teammates have cheerfully surrounded him. They begin to sing.
(to the tune of “Under the Sea” from The Little Mermaid)
Jeff Carter: “Don’t worry ‘bout being captain, for you it’s a piece of cake. You’re SportSquee’s responsible boyfriend… that was your first big break.”
Mike Knuble and Scott Hartnell (calmly dragging a panicked Richards back into the middle of the locker room): “This decision might confound you, just don’t bolt right out the door! The world revolves around you! Who else could have such allure?!”
All: “Under the C, under the C!”
Kimmo Timonen: “Richie, that letter belongs on your sweater, take it from me!”
All: “Out on the ice, you’d work all day. For twelve years, we want you to stay! We finished voting and know you’ll be doting under the C!”
Simon Gagne: “Okay, so we missed the playoffs, but you freed us from that hole.”
Marty Biron (whispering): “We’d give the C to Hatcher, but you know that he’s a troll…”
Joffrey Lupul and Scottie Upshall (as they scoot up next to Richards and then stand on either side of him): “And you’ve got us for wingmen, and we could never hate. We’ll meet lots more girls now and take them out on dates! Woo-hoo!” (Richards nods approvingly. He’s clearly beginning to warm up to the idea of being captain.)
All: “Under the C, under the C!”
Riley Cote (ripping a telephone book in half in a pre-season rage): “So the Pens beat us, just wait ‘til they meet us eventually!”
John Stevens (sticking his head into the room and holding a clipboard): “You’ll be the star of our playbook, and teams will give you a second look…”
Derian Hatcher: “We’ll have no troubles, and you’ll get more stubble!”
All: “Under the C (under the C)! Under the C (under the C)!”
Stevens: “Since we lost Gator, and you’re a good skater, naturally…”
Kyle McLaren, Milan Michalek, and Christian Ehrhoff (popping out from behind a closed door): “Even us boys in San Jose can see how flawlessly you play!”
Randy Jones: “Our fans have spirit--”
Danny Briere (muttering): “And they’ll let you hear it…”
All: “Under the C!”
The Flyers congregate and lift Richards onto their shoulders and parade him around the room jubilantly. His dream fades out, and he is now able to sleep peacefully in bed, with visions of his captaincy dancing through his head.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Best Birthday Present!
Now Jess and I just need to go through the schedule and figure out what other games we want to go to next year.
Is it hockey-time yet?!
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
What a big tease you are NHL
Now the Flyers three Western Conference choices aren't as exciting to me (barring the Sharks, of course). They're playing the Avalanche, the Sharks (!!!) and the Kings. I'm really pissed that their home opener is on the 11th. I'm flying back home for Fall Break on the morning of the 11th. Way to mess it up, NHL schedulers. I wonder if I can convince my parents to change my ticket for the 12th...
Friday, July 11, 2008
Hands off Ehrhoff
A beautiful friendshipTuesday, July 8, 2008
Everybody wants you!
Well, this obviously needed to be revisited!
Steve: "Waaahhh, I'm not really Stretch Armstrong!"Monday, July 7, 2008
Breaking News!

Now the all important question: are they too red, or can you tell that they're supposed to be orange? I think that they're orange enough, but what do I know? Some woman told me they were very patriotic. I guess so, if we lived in Halloweenland. Regardless, I enjoy them a lot.
