Thursday, February 14, 2008

The Dangers of Gaming

Juuso -- I can't pronounce your name properly, but I love you

So, I like to play video games, namely NHL08. I love to dish out the hits and take special delight in seeing the other team's (key words being "other team's" because I'm extremely protective of my boys even in virtual form) players limp off the ice. It's great because until the AI's touch the puck or there's a stoppage, the guy just stays there, curled up in a fetal position in center ice.

Now, there are many different modes of the game that you can play. I usually rock the dynasty mode because I enjoy making the perfect team and playing all 82+ games in a season; I like having that end goal of winning it all. So, like the impartial and level-headed GM that I am, I was going through the list of free agents to see possible aquisitions based on important qualities such as the uniqueness of name and cuteness of headshot. I think I must have stumbled on the jackpot with Juuso Antonen. The 19 year old Finnish left winger won me over entirely with his big happy-go-lucky grin. I quickly found myself with Juuso Fever. Everytime I play with my team's AHL affiliate, I'm constantly searching for his 42 on the ice. I flat out refuse to let anyone else on the team get an empty net goal. If Juuso doesn't get it, none of those bitches will.

So, what's the problem? I've broadened my horizons, what am I complaining for? Here's the deal, I can't find more stuff about him. Well, that's not true. I can't find stuff about him that's not in Finnish. So here I am with my insatiable Juuso appetite and there's nothing I can do about it. And to make matters worse, from my masteful use of an online translator, I've discovered that he's had an "unfortunate hurting". This "unfortunate hurting," I've deduced, has prevented him from playing this year. So here I am fretting about the boy and I don't even know why. It's making me a mess.

Damn you NHL08, making me fall for obscure foreign players that I can't properly stalk.

1 comment:

elise said...

Wow, cute mugshots are a plus...those are generally very rare. For some reason, even attractive players tend to look unfortunate for hockey mugshots. But we all love them anyway.

I have found myself wishing I knew Finnish many, many times before.