Monday, March 17, 2008

The Jolly Postgirls

Dear Pickles,

We understand you want to score. WE want you to score. But please please PLEASE stop deflecting the goals into your own net. That's the cheap way to win our love.

XOXO
Soph and Jess



To: Hatcher

Just because you are injured does not mean we like you or will like you. FYI.

Sincerely,
Soph and Jess

PS. Enjoy the month off. Eat lots of children, you child-eating-troll you.



My Dearest Milan,

Now's the time to strike when the iron's hot! Score lots of goals and leave Cheechoo in the dust, eating fried moose-meat and looking awkward! You deserve to have to most goals on the team, my lovely little (???) Czech!

Yours Truly,
Soph



Dear Rusty,

Get well soon. I hope you aren't just using this "sprained knee" as way to avoid the suck-fest that is currently the Islanders or the fans that apparently hate you. I still love you!!!

Love always,
Jess

PS. Maybe if you cut your hair, it would be a reverse Samson and you would get stronger (and I would enjoy you more if you and Soph didn't have the same haircut. That look only really works on girls).



To our beloved Kyle,

Please continue to be your perfect self. You're like the coolest but simultaneously dorkiest person ever. And we adore you.

Yours forever,
Soph and Jess



Lasse, Lupul, Marty and Smith,

PLEASE DON'T GET INJURED BEFORE MARCH 23, 2008. IT WOULD BE PREFERABLE FOR YOU NOT TO GET INJURED AT ALL.

Soph and Jess

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